


Frozen Souls (Jelsa Apocalypse AU)

by Lamplight



Category: Frozen (2013), Frozen - Fandom, Jack Frost - Fandom, Jelsa - Fandom, Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Apocalypse, Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Zombies, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-15
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-01 16:28:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5212772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lamplight/pseuds/Lamplight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Elsa was never allowed to go outside, and only heard small bits of the breakout that had devastated the world. This was due to the fact that Elsa had lived with a monster for a husband- Hans. The drunken abuser held her captive for 3 years, until it all changed. This is where Jack comes in. He saves her from her hell, helping her reach safety, and in the meanwhile, shows Elsa the 'breakout' is much more than a small epidemic that she's heard such whispers about. It is a world wide devastation. The small base holding survivors is the only safe place to hide from the walking dead that roam this fallen world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lost to the Undead

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Those who have survived the war known as life](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Those+who+have+survived+the+war+known+as+life).



> This fanfiction work contains topics such as sexual abuse, violence, emotional abuse, trauma, and other such topics. I didn't choose any of the warnings though, because I didn't feel they fit properly. If you are sensitive to these or they trigger you, please protect yourself and discontinue reading this. Take care of yourself please. :)  
> -K (author)

Elsa  
I heard the door squeak open, as I sat shaking in terror in the bedroom corner. It was him. The abuser. The monster who I was sold to, by my protector. My father sold me because we desperately needed money for food, especially in these times. It wasn't human trafficking, technically. Just a rich man who wanted an 18 year old for a wif- no, a slave. Often, I felt the yelling and lashes of his drunken self. Often I had bruises. I never was allowed anything, and fear was my only friend. The man- the monster- stole me from my father across the broken country, with no one left in the world. All I know is this demon.  
I heard his scattered feet drag across the floor. Drunk. Again. He whispered my name, and it echoed through the haunting hallways of this apartment. His voice was different then before. Darker, and more evil. Almost inhumane. Wait!-  
My thoughts were cut short when he stumbled into the room, giving me his glare.  
"P-please" I begged. I had so much physical pain and I didnt want anymore. Why do I beg? Like this menace creature cares.  
He, the devil that captured me, grunted, and crawled down to me. His thick, sweaty breath stung against my neck.  
He looked into my eyes, but all I saw back was nothingness in his eyes. He tugged at my shirt. I know now what he came for.  
I try to push him off, but he slaps me hard in the face.  
"You are mine. I own you, and you do as I sayyy" his voice lingers at each word, either of arousal or struggles to correctly form a sentence. There is alcohol on his breath, and it's suffocating.  
I begged for him to stop, but he kept on. He lifted my shirt, smelling me as he caressed my breasts. I cried for him to stop, but he never did.  
He bit my skin, preparing to take my bra.  
"P-please." I let myself cry. It's all I ever do, is cry.  
He smacked me hard across my face, bruising it. I screamed in pain. There was no reason to hide my sheer terror. He already knows its what cripples me.  
I try to get away, but he pins me to the wall with one hand, and with the other he slips one strap off. He begins to slip another as I sob when- BANG. A gun goes off.

\--------------  
Jack

I walk along the streets of a nearly cleared area of town. Very few walkers appear. Often they're newly bitten people who don't even know it. They still have their self, but soon they quickly loose it. I wait for them to attack me before I have to kill them. I hate having to put bullets through things that were once people but I do it anyway.  
I head down the street, my gun loaded, as I search for anyone who still has themselves and hasn't lost it to a walker. I hear a scream of a window, and run inside the building.  
Its an apartment building. I run up the stairs, nearing the sobs- probably from a female, but I'm not sure.  
I'm on the right floor, I think, because I hear her voice so clearly. Her sobs and her pain. I hear someone else too, and he shouts how he owns this sobbing woman. This pisses me off, extremely.  
I follow the noise, and find the door- it's open. I see the handle with blood, slimy blood and that's when I know there's a walker near by. I slowly walk in, hiding myself.  
I see a woman, maybe my age, sobbing as this man bites her breasts. Its obviously forced, but I cant tell which one of them is the walker.  
I internationally beg it's not the girl with scattered hair and a helpless cry. I hope its the slob using her like a doll.  
What do I do?  
I watch the man, the abusive scum, and decipher on what to do. I look closely, and see the bite on his neck, oozing with slimey, nearly green blood; he's infected.  
Good.  
Her begging breaks my thoughts of observation, and I have no trouble putting a bullet through his head.  
She screams and goes into the fetal position. I crouch down to her, and her shaking is very extreme. I try to touch her shoulder to comfort her, but she screams in horror and pushes me back without opening her shut eyes. There are streams flowing down her face, and I see cuts and bruises that dominate her skin.  
I grunt lightly as I'm pushed back, and she seems to hear so.  
Her eyes slowly open, her hands barely letting them see me.  
I try to smile a little, showing her I'd never hurt her. She's very beautiful, and I can't believe she's is- well, was- with this bimbo.  
Her broken eyes find mine, but she still shakes. I pick up the shirt that was probably tossed off at one point, and hand it too her. Im careful not to get too close.  
"Here you go." I say lightly, smiling a little. "I'm Jack. I promise I won't hurt you."  
She still shakes vigorously, but slowly grabs the shirt, and puts it on after she adjusts her bra. I dare not focus on anything but her eyes. Even though I strictly keep myself to her stunning blue eyes, I still fill like I'm violating her.  
I turn around, and tell her to tell me when she's adjusted herself.  
It takes maybe a few minutes, but it doesn't bother me to wait. I would not let myself be impatient at a time like this.  
"D-d-done" her nearly silent voice quivers. She looks at the corpse beside me, and back at me like I murdered him. I didn't really, because he was infected. Is she infected? Maybe she thinks I killed him just because. I clear things up for her.  
"I didn't kill him, he was infected. I promise you, I'm not a murder. Not to humans, anyway. Well, if you call this *I point to the body, which doesn't bleed* murder." She looks puzzled.  
"In- infected?" Her voice asks. It's so broken and shattered, and all I want to do is hug her and comfort her, but she didn't react well to when I first tried to touch her.  
"He was bit by a walker. He must have been recently, because he seemed to still be himself, and not a flesh-eater. Did he bite you?" I pray he didnt infect her. If he did, im digging to the hell where he should be rotting and killing him again.  
"H-here" her voice breaks. She points to her chest.  
"Are you bleeding there?" I ask, making sure I dont dare get any closer to her. She must be so terrified.  
She shakes her head. We sit in slight silence, and I hear a screech of a walker.  
"We'll need to go now, I know a safe place to stay." I look at her. She's stopped crying, and isn't shaking as much.

\------------

Elsa

Safe. What is that life? Safe? All I know is fear. This random person just killed the monster that had enslaved me. He says he didn't really kill a human, but a walker. I think that's the zombie thing Hans would rambled about. He, Jack, could have killed him any day and having not actually killed a human.  
I watch him, his silver blue eyes that seem so full of life. His eyes search mine. I don't feel so invaded, but I don't feel completely okay with him yet.  
"O-okay" I manage to say. It takes every muscle I have to spit out words.  
Jack gets up, and offers me a hand. I don't want it. I don't know how to want it, or accept it. So I force my crippled body up. He rushes to my side, seeing how weak of a person I am, but I shout at him to not touch me. I get up and see his eyes. They seem alert, but not scared.  
"Sorry" I finally muster out. I don't know what took over me to scream at him, but its not like I enjoyed touching.  
"Oh no, its alright. You have your reasons, and that's okay." His voice soothed me in a way I have forgotten about. The way my father talked, before he threw me away. They way my mother talked, because I knew she loved me.  
Jack will throw me away too. Just like father. He'll use me, like Hans. I glare at him, showing him I do not trust him.  
He sees my glare, but doesn't seem to hate me for it. He isn't leaving me or hurting me. Why? Aren't all men evil to their core? Yes, they are. Jack can just hide it better.  
"Follow me, out to the truck. I'll bring you to safety." He smiles. Suddenly, I feel an emotion I thought I lost. I fell trust. Is it trust? What does that even feel like? Maybe I don't trust him with anything, but just that he'll show me this place of safety.  
He walks to the door way, and turns back. I don't move, but I want to. I want to be able to sleep for once, and not cry away and slowly die.  
"You don't have to, but that place is way better and safer than here".  
Is he, is he giving me a choice? Why? Why isn't he hurting me and taking me captive? Why is he so... different?

\--------------  
Jack

She slowly walks to meet me at the doorway. I can tell she's extremely weak. I can see her ribs and bones. I go into what I suppose is the kitchen, and open the fridge. It's 90% beer, but I grab the few bottles of water and small package of microwavable chicken. I put it into a bag, and by now she has reached the kitchen.  
She watched me as I collect every salvageable can into the bag. I grab the towels, and run warm water from the sink in them. Luckily, these apartments still have electricity. She has sat down in a wooden chair, and she's very pale.  
I walk over to her, and place a water bottle and the cold chicken in front of her. I sit in the chair beside her, but it's far enough for her space I think.  
"Have some food and water. You need some. Here's a towel with warm water in it. It will help some of your bruises and wounds." I place the towel beside her.  
She looks at me, and slowly turns to the chicken, then back at me. Has she never eaten something for herself before?  
Her bone-thin are shakes as she stretches it out to me.  
"Wil- will you?" Her voice is dry. Its been burdened from all her pain.  
"You sure? If you don't want me too, I won-" she cuts me off.  
"Just do it!" She screams, turning away.  
I carefully scoot closer, and place her arm on my knees, and begin to very lightly wash away dirt and dried blood. It was red, so it's either hers or the abusive mutt's before he was bitten.  
She winces at the rag, but doesn't seem to be in pain.  
It takes her a solid minute to swallow her first piece of chicken. She soon eats it quicker, and by the time I finish washing her arm, she's eaten it all and it gulping the water. She finished the bottom quickly.  
Her shaking has nearly ceased.  
She see's her clean arm, and examines it like it's gold. She hands her her other arm, still entranced by the clean one.  
I clean her arm, and she watches me.  
"Thank you." She says.  
"You're welcome, I guess. You don't deserve to be here, with that pig."  
\------------------  
Elsa

I don't? Yes I do. My father threw me out like garbage, and Hans was just the collector. I watched him clean away my arms. I've never had anyone carefully hold them, like they were worth something. Why is Jack doing this? He's a boy! They are the most evil things to crawl this earth, aren't they?  
"You're wrong. I did. Stop helping me, I'm just trash." Those words were the easiest to say.  
He looks at me, shocked.  
"What, no! You're not trash! You are a human of worth! You matter in this world. I promise you, you're not trash. He was trash. You shouldn't have been treated like that." He seems sincere, but I haven't heard anything sincere in a long time.  
Am I? Am I more than an old mess thrown away, only to be captured by another devil? No, I'm worthless. Jacks just saying that so he can use me, like everybody else in my life.  
I shrug what he said away, and he begins to say something when more screeching occurs.  
"We need to go now. Grab any cloths you can carry, please" he said please? Like, it's a choice?  
I grab the clothes I can find in the floor- mostly mine- and follow Jack down some stairs. Surprisingly, I can walk, and almost run. I still fill exhausted from 3 years of abuse, but this is the first time in what feels like forever that I've gotten a full meal.  
Jack's truck sits near the building, but I'm to busy looking at the buildings. For 3 years, I never saw this. Wow. Jack called me, but he didn't use my name. I never told it to him, did I?  
I got into the truck. It was really difficult, since lifting myself was so physically painful. He started it, and I had to fight flashbacks of when I was last in a car- with Hans.  
He drove into the sky, which was fairly dark. Maybe it's almost sundown. That seems logical.  
We rode in silence, until I finally said something.  
"I am Elsa."  
He returned with, "oh, well hello, Elsa. Nice to meet you."


	2. Chapter II // Heal What Has Been Hurt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have several chapters written, so yay! Comment your inputplease!

Jack

The night drive was quiet. Elsa, the stunning being hurled in the seat, had the cloths she brought beside her. Her body was so frail, that her seat could hold her and the pile of shirts. Her head leaned against the window, and her body was still. But her mind was alive.

I could tell, because she seemed in awe of the city, and the night sky. It's like she's never seen it before, but that's impossible. I really want to learn more about her, but I don't want to trouble her with anything.

She watched the moon, and the light filled her eyes. She was beautiful, but why was she stuck with that monster? Finally, I attempted to break the silence.

"The moon is amazing, isn't it?" Idiot. That’s all I've got?

She looks at me, and slightly nods. I guess that's all she can do. I stop the car, arriving at the central city. It's the heart of the old city, with towering walls to kept creatures out.

Elsa seems alarmed, and scared.

"It's okay, they're just checking us before we go in. We have to get out for them to look." I explain as I do so.

She watches me, and slowly inches herself out the car. Her body is so weak, and I just want to feed her everything in this camp.

We step out, and the guard pats me down, and checks places for any bites- neck, arms, legs, ect. I immediately remember Elsa doesn't want touch.

I remember to late, because she screams as a guard lifts her hair to check if she was bit on the neck. The guards jump back, but I try to explain.

"No, no , no. You can't- just... just don't touch her, okay? Intruct her, but she's very weak so she can't do much. I'm taking her in to get some help." The guards nod, and I think they get the picture.

Slowly but surely Elsa is checked and cleared for entrance. I give the car keys to Hiccup, who manages and over looks vehicles. He drives the car into the inner safety of our city, and parks it in the mass garage. I walk Elsa in, as shops slowly appear. We reach a small building, where soilders like me report to. Sergeant Winters was sitting in a chair outside his office. He stands in shock when he sees Elsa.

"E- Elsa? " he says, like maybe his worst or greatest dream came true. He knows Elsa? Huh.

I look at her, but she just glares at him like he's a repulsive rat crawling along the ground.

He jogs up with him arms spread to hug her, but I stop him.

"Sr., physical contact is not good for her. I found her in aparment complex 5, area C. She was..." how do I explain, molested? Being treated like nothing? Getting abused? "Under rough circumstances. " I explain the conditions Elsa was in, which was horrid, along with us grabbing some cloths and food, but leaving out the beer. No need for alcoholism in this facility.

He gives a solid nod, but focuses on Elsa. She seems horrified- why?

"I- I thought you were lost forever." He muttered out.

"You wish!" She said, her eyes glossy and almost spilling tears. Her anger was obvious. Why? And how do they know each other?

"No, Elsa... darling, I thought-" his soft tone is cut off.

"Don't call me that! I'm not your darling! You wouldn't sell a darling!" By now she was crying. She was screaming with extreme rage.

Sell? Why would anyone sell her? Why is she so angry with Sergeant Winters?

"Sold? What do you mean? What are you talking about?" His confusion almost seemed too sincere, but why should I judge, or even care?

"You sold me to that monster. Don't lie! You sold me to Hans just for a crummy piece of bread!" Her voice broke. She seemed so shattered on the inside.

"Elsa, I would never sell you! Hans said you had to stay at a remote hospital, and then that's what we last heard."

"No! No- y-you.... you sol- what?" She grasped her head in immense confusion.

Sergeant Winters stepped forward, but she just shouted for him to go away. Another woman came in- Mrs. Winters, and saw Elsa. Her hands found her eyes, as she tried to hide sobs. She seemed so relieved, but she only stepped as close as Sergeant, but she wasn't anywhere near him.

"M-mom?" Elsa said, swallowing some tears.

Mom? Mom! Elsa is a Winters!

Finally it makes sense. Sort of.

Elsa

I don't know how to process anything. It's all blank. I might be crying, but I'm just trying to make sure this is real life.

They're alive?

No.

Yes?

Luckily, my mother has always been very perceptive. She didn't try to come close. I'm so thankful that she respects my space. Kind of odd, since my dad, who says he didn't sell me, treated her so poorly. Not like Hans, but still pathetically. She deserves so much more.

It takes Jack a few times at calling my name for me to snap out of my trance.

"Elsa? You alright?" He seemed so companionable, but no men are like that, right? Right. He is just using me. He doesn't actually care. How stupid I am to think that.

"C- can we go? Food m-maybe?" Why is talking so difficult? I stutter at every other word! I can't even stop myself from shaking again.

I feel like everyone is staring at me. Their eyes are piercing me, stabbing me, and ultimately destroying me. They should stop looking at me. Please stop staring.

"Alright. How about food? You'll need a lot to heal." Jack recommends.

He only is doing this so he can use you later.

I dismiss the voice in my head. I don't want Jack to be like every man. He can't be.

But, then again, what's it like? Living in peace. I'll never know peace. But peace is for the weak. I'm not weak. I survived my father, and I survived Hans. I'm not weak.

I nod my head, but it's weak. If I'm honest, I feel so weak. I haven't walked this much in a while. Hans always had me stuck in the apartment. Now I'm free. Free to be hurt again. That's how the world works though, I guess.

But at what cost? Hans died. That bastard deserved it.

Jack was kind in the fast and easy death he gave Hans. Hans should've died slowly. He should've known my pain.

Jack waves me over, and I have to focus intensely just to keep my feet moving.

I'm slow. I can tell. It's embarrassing, but it's all I can do.

We walk, Jack constantly making sure he's beside me, to a large tent. There are lanterns with little purple suns on them spread beautifully across the area. It is lit perfectly.

"Hey, Rapunzel. Can you get Elsa some soup and water?" He asks.

'Rapunzel' is a girl with short, raggedly cut brown hair in a faded pink dress with more rips than I have bruises. She smiles, and it makes me calm down. It's hard to explain.

I've only had one friend my life. But she's gone. I don't need to have feelings about it, though. Feelings are weak. I am not weak.

She tells me to sit at this worn, wooden table. It takes a lot of effort, but I get it. She gives me soup and a large container of water.

The soup is cold, and delicious. Rapunzel poured it from a can, and it's amazing. Much better than when I had next to nothing for food. No life line.

But now, maybe I can.

No.

That's stupid of me. How dare I think like that. I'm just someone's play toy. My worth to anyone is nonexistent.

Jack

For such a fragial person, Elsa finishes her soup pretty quickly. She gulps the water down also equally as fast.

Her lips curl lightly upwards, as if maybe she was smiling. I hope she is. I hope she feels safe, and at peace. I'll die before I see any more abuse inflicted on her. I don't even know the whole story, but I know she's already gone through too much.

We all have.

But I don't want to think about the past. It's too painful to try to remember. I'll just try to forget, like I always do.

I escort Elsa to the infirmary, which is next door. Rapunzel works at both places, the kitchen and the make shift hospital, and for that I respect her.

When Elsa walks in, a few eyes watch. I don't think the attention is settling in well, because I can tell she's filled to the brim with anxiety. I try to bring her to a corner, and show her aa cot to sleep in until a living quarter can be assigned.

"You'll have to stay here until they can find you a place, and heal." As soon as I say this, her eyes scream with fear and distance.

"P-please no." She says, choking. Her words are so soft I almost miss them.

"But there's no living area for you. It'll be okay, you can just sleep and heal while you wait." Even if I try to encourage her stay, I don't think she wants it.

She raises a shaking finger, and points to me. "Can I stay?" Her voice is dry and corse.

How do I respond? I only have one bed in my living quarter.

"Please. My parents... they can't find.. please." I miss some of her words, because they are either unclear or so quiet I can't hear her.

"Okay, sure."

I don't know why I agreed.

I make sure to stay by her, in case she falls. I don't have to be a nurse or doctor to know she might collapse from her frail body failing her. She has to stop twice as I lead her to my living area, and I offer to carry her, but she refuses. She forces herself onward, but I can tell it's really painful.

Of course she didn't want to be carried. Stupid.

We reach the steps to an old square house, where I and 3 other residents stay. She tried to walk up the steps, but it's not working.

"I'm so sorry, Elsa." I say, before picking her up bridal style, and carrying her in, up the stars, and to my room. She tries to fight me off, but that consists of her slightly hiting me, too tired to say anything.

I plop her on the bed, and her eyes are getting pretty heavy.

"I'm- I'm sorry" I whisper, as her eyes drift into sleep.

Elsa

Told you. He didn't use me, he just carried me.

The voice that echoes in my head isn't right. He whispers something as he tucks the covers over me, but I give up the battle of weariness, and let myself find sleep. It's been a long time since sleep came to me- the sweet kind of sleep, anyway.

So I sleep, and I sleep heavily.

~~~~~this is a dream bruh~~~~~~

I stand on an island, surrounded by black. I'm wearing just a skimpy night gown. I cry, screaming for help, but I only hear the echoes of my voice.

Then, out if the water, comes Hans. His evil grin readily tells me to run. But I can't. My feet won't move.

I scream at him to go away, and to leave me alone, but he doesn't. 

"NO!!" I scream, and I fall through the island, into the water.

It is calm, and I'm surrounded by soft waves under the water, echoing the beautiful colour of a soft blue. 

I float calmly, like in space. But in water. Safe water.

Water of comfort.

I see Jack, and he floats to me. He smiles sweetly, but then he seems something behind me. He tries to tell me to get away.

I turn around and see my father, with bloody hands. I turn back around, expecting Jack, but he's gone. He's rushing away. He's leaving me.

I try to get away, but I can't. My father seems to grow 20 times bigger, into a giant.

He maniacally laughs, and darkness swells from behind, chasing me. It's coming closer, and closer, and I shut my eyes.

I hear a scream.

I look up to see my mother, absorbing the darkness instead of me. I cry for her, but her eyes become black.

I get pushed back, and she's holding herself, shaking, trying to contain my father's darkness.

"MOM!!"

She explodes before my eyes, and there is no darkness left. Some how, my father dies.

I scream and scream.

I scream at Hans, and at Jack, and at my parents. I scream and scream, and my head roars.

All I do is scream.

 

~~~~~~out of the dream woooOOOOOOooooo~~~~~

Jack

I wake up to Elsa screaming, and crying. I jump up from the floor, which is where I slept, and I see she's sleeping. Well, she was sleeping.

I wake her, not even bothering on avoiding physical touch.

"Elsa wake up! It's just a dream! It's not real!"

Elsa jolts up, and she stares off, trying to calm herself down. She's sweating, and breathing heavily.

"It's okay, Elsa. It's just a bad dream. It'll be okay. “I try to sooth her.

"But it wasn't" she coldly retorts.

Of course it was, wasn't it?

I run my hand up and down her arm, trying to calm her down . She doesn't seem to mind.

I try to softly hush her, and lean her down back to sleep. She lays back down, and swallows hard. Her eyes are wide open, but I still go back to the floor with a pillow and blanket to sleep.

She has to work through this herself, because I can't do anything about it. I'd only make it worse.

I let my eyes close, and I hear her faded voice.

"J-Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks. For ev-everything. Sorry you hav-have to take care of m-me." She mutters.

"Elsa, it's alright, really. I... I want to help you." I didn't mean to say it romantically, but it kinda came out like that.

Of course, how could I feel romance? I only just met her. I don't feel anything, she's just a injured human, and I'm helping her heal. That's it.

She responds almost silently. "Oh."

Morning reaches us, and I wake up to see Elsa sleeping softly. I head down stairs, and prepare a breakfast for her.

Commander E. Aster, or Bunny, is preparing breakfast. He's the person who overlooks the house.

It's him, my buddy Hiccup, Flynn Rider, and I who live here. It's considerably nicer than living in an old apartment building across the camp.

I get to live in a house with my own room because I'm an 'Honorary Soldier.' I like it here.

I grab two slices of toast, a boiled egg, an apple, and put them on a plate. I fill a glass with orange juice, and grab two reusable water bottles, both filled. I place the food on a tray, and decide to grab something for myself.

I quickly snag a protein bar, and head up stars. I walk in, and hear muffled sniffs.

Immediately I place the tray and drinks on the small table close to my door, a rush to the sound.

Elsa huddled herself in a corner, hugging her legs. She shakes, begging for Hans to go away.

Hans? But Hans is dead. Why would she be so scared? He's dead. I shot him.

I think she sees me, but doesn't see that it's me, if that makes sense. She trashes her arms, pleading.

"Hans, no please!" She cries.

I squat down, and make sure to be on her level.

"Elsa... it's me, Jack. Hans is gone. Forever. You don't have to worry anymore. I promise".

Her eyes seem to fall out of her trance, or nightmare, or whatever it is. She looks at me, and I try to smile warmly. She looks around, like she's realizing where she is.

"Oh, I'm so sorry- I just- I'm sorry..." she says, getting up, avoiding eye contact.

"No, no no, it's alright! Part of healing, I guess... It's okay, though- really." I assure her. 

I just need to help her, because she's going through so much. I'd better not leave her now. Not at this time.

She crawls back into the bed, but I keep her awake long enough to eat all the food, and drink the juice and water. She asks for more food, but assures it's not necessary. I give her the protein bar, and she falls asleep.

I decided to take the week off from anything, so I can help Elsa until she is strong again.

She's so beautiful. Why was she with Hans, who I assume must be the slob she lived with? Were they in love?

Just the thought burns me to the core. I shot him in the head, right? Too quick. At least he can't become a walker now.

Elsa sleeps almost all the time. When she wakes, I make sure she eats a lot, and drinks a lot.

It's been a few days now. She's slowly healing. Slowly but surely.


	3. Chapter III // The Nightmare of Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for delays! I have plenty chapters written I just forget to update them. Thank you for kudos and comments!!

**Jack**

For a week, it was the healing process. Elsa would sleep, and eat, and drink,  and sleep. Slowly,  I could see her body strengthen.

On the fifth day of the week, Elsa walked around by herself. This is important, because I'm assuming when I brought her she was running on fear and adrenaline.  Maybe now she'll be safe. I hope she feels safe. I hope she is safe.

Strangely,  Elsa's dad, the 'leader' of the survivors of this epidemic, never visited. I reported to him after I knew Elsa would stay awhile via my communication watch, but the only message he replied with was a mission to do asap.

Her mother came after a few days. I asked why, but she said I didn't need to worry about it, and to not tell Srgnt. Winters. Okay??

Elsa's mother would watch Elsa as she slept. She smiled often, and asked about her healing. I tried to figure out why Sargeant Winters never came, but she just briefly described him as 'busy'.

That's stupid! I mean, I get it- he's running one of the only source of human life, but still. Elsa's his daughter! 

Anyway, Else's mother didn't want Elsa to know about her, and she stopped coming once Elsa was able to stay awake for longer periods of time. It was awfully suspicious, but I never questioned. 

Now, the 8th day after I brought Elsa, I know I have to get her situated somewhere. Across the street there's a female military house, like mine, with a spot open. But Elsa's not a soldier. Maybe I could try the 'mental stability' card.

I mean, she will need someone to help her adjust to this hell hole of a world, right?

Yes, right. She will want a friend. Maybe I could be that friend?

I could try. I will try.

For Elsa, of course.

**Elsa**

I've been able to stay awake and walk for a few days, but honestly I just want to stay in Jack's bed forever. I love this feeling of what?

Safety? Comfort?

I though those things never existed.  They don't , I'm just being a pathetic human.

I need to not feel. I need to be strong, not lay on a bed.

I'm selfish for sleeping when I could be doing something.

But in all honesty,  sleep makes me forget the past.

Of Hans. Of my father. Of everything in between. 

But sometimes sleep is what helps me remember the most, and what makes me want to stay awake forever.

It's been how long? 6, 7, 8 days? 

Too long.  I've spent too much time here. I need to move.

I need to discover my new life.

What do I do now? 

My entire life is some man using me and fixing me to his needs. I guess now I just change for Jack. I guess he's the new ruler of my life.

But he isn't hurting me. Why?! Why won't he just tailor me his needs? All men do it, right?

He should be hurting me, it's all I've even known. He's not, though. It's so strange.  I don't know if I want this or not.

But for now, I'll just shove all the confusion and emotions of everything away. Conceal it, so no one has to deal with it. No one should have to deal with me.

I told Jack recently I've rested enough. He says that it's great of me. I don't get it, though, why he thinks me gaining strength of my own is good.

He says soon I'll have to find my own bed, but I understand,  even though he tries to explain it's not him pushing me away. I don't think it is,  I think it's fact. I can't be cradled by Jack forever.

Jack explains soon he'll have to go back into duty, and he has a new objective. My father gave it to him. I can't believe he listens to my father. Doesn't he knoe what kind of monster my dad is?!

The new 'mission', as he calls it, is to retrieve the beer from the apartment I stayed at before here. Wherever here is. It's for medical use, since Jack says my father explained how he was going to try and extract the alcohol,  but that it must be privately delivered so no one tries to drink it.

I knew my father had a drinking problem, but maybe it was for medical purposes. Maybe my dad has changed from before Hans. Maybe. Just maybe.

Jack explains how I should stay at the camp, because 1. The outside is extremely dangerous,  and he said he didn't want me to get hurt. 2. We'd go back to the place I used to rot in, and he says it may be hard for me to do.

No, I'm done being under his shelter. He can take me and I'll prove it. I'm not weak. I will never be weak.

He agrees to take me first thing in the morning,  which is only in a few hours, but I couldn't sleep.

The questions of the outside fill my brain. I try to just sleep, because I've been doing it for a week, so why can't I sleep now? Ugh.

I just watch the light slowly fill the room. I also look down beside the bed on the floor, to see Jack.

I can't deny his attractiveness. His soft, freshly washed hair (probably washed when I was sleeping) shines lightly as the sun rises.

He sleeping is silent, and peaceful. I crave the peace he seems to find in sleep.

I sometimes have a little, but the nightmares always come. Some are so bad I scream myself awake, and Jack's there, guiding me back to sleep.

Come to think of it, he's often there.

The sun has fully risen, and I let myself smile as Jack yawns awake. When he wakes up like this, no screaming monster in his bed to disrupt him, he doesn't even open his eyes fully.

He isn't even fully awake, since he hasn't seem to notice me. He gets up, and scratches his wild hair. He stretches, and rubs his eyes.

I think he's awake, because now he notices me.

"Oh, hey. Didn't know you were up." He yawns again.

"Can I shower?" I blurt out, not even processing his words.

"Um, sure. I have my own bathroom, it's to the left next to the door." He seems casual. Maybe it's because he's planning something. Men plan evil things. They do, I know so.

For I've never met a man who intentionally was kind without an incentive.

I finally shower after maybe 10 days. It's amazing, and I take my time.

When Hans still had me, I only showered when he was for sure gone. Even then I often feared if he would catch me caring for myself. But now, I can.

I finish washing myself, and dry my hair lazily with a towel. I braid it back after years of not being allowed to.

My dad hated the brain, so he made me always wear a bun like my mothers, and Hans didn't allow it. Hans wanted my hair to be down, so he could tug it when he needed to cause me pain. Well now guess what?

Its my hair now, and I say it goes in a braid.

I slip on the same cloths I've worn for a while, but it's better than nothing.

When I get out, Jack insists I get new cloths. He already ready for this 'mission', which I've been allowed to come on.

So I change into a long black sleeved shirt, and dark jeans. I love the way these closes wrap around me, guarding me. It's the only guard I've ever had, and I'm content with them.

Once I am ready, Jack leads me out the house.

I've never actually seen the outside, since it was dark when I came. It's beautiful.

Old houses are lined on this small street that connects to a main square with a few more streets.

We walk to the cemented area, which is two buildings, and a few tents. One of the tents is Rapunzel's, because her lanterns are spread around. Next to her tent is I suppose the food one, and then besides that is a small, yet sturdy one. It's just boxes of books, but as Jack and I pass it, I realize what it is.

It's a book of names, and almost all of them are crossed out. I see my name, freshly imprinted. I see no recognized names, but then again I've never had any body to know.

Jack and I walk to the edge of the center, to the massive walls made of concrete and wiring. Hiccup, whom I'm introduced to by Jack, shows us Jack's truck.

It's a deep maroon color, with minor scratches and bumps, but some stains of oddly green blood (??). What?

We hop in, and Jack drives. The city is so beautiful, even if I've never really seen in. Jack fills me in on the whole zombie breakout thing.

Roughly 3 years ago, some virus went around that was extremely deadly. It would take over the brain, and cause a lot of nerve and body system issues. Tons of people got it, until an experimental drug was tested to see if it would heal humanity. Some doctors tried it illegally on several people, but the drug would work backwards.  It aided the virus into creating _things._ The outbreak spread extremely quickly, since nobody knew about it, and that it would spread somewhat easily. So then, my dad the 'acclaimed genius' constructed a large wall around a small portion of the city for any survivors.  Now, soldiers like Jack go out every day to find survivors, food, medicine, and anything helpful.

If he wanted something helpful, I don't know why he got me. I'm useless.

******

As we drive, I decide to ask Jack a few things about him. Who is he? I only know him as the savior, the one who destroyed the evil that owned me. But I'm sure that's not all to him, right? Why does he live alone, instead of with a family?  I get he's a soldier, but still.

"Do you have any family?" The question I ask makes his eyes glossy, and he bites at his lips.

"No." He coldly responds. "They're gone." He adds, trying to seem less bitter, but he's still pretty cold.

"I'm- I'm sorry. How?" As soon as my mouth works before my brain, I realize how horrible of a question that is. "I'm sorry, you don't have to tell me. It's- I'm sorry for asking."

"It's fine, but I don't want to talk about it." He says, trying to let me off easy. I knew he didn't trust me. 

"How did you become a soldier?" I finally manage after a moment of silence.

I hate the silence that's between us. It's not that it's awkward or uncomfortable, but new. I do not know a silence like this- one of peace. Is this peace? It's so odd. No fear he'll attack me. No echoing cries from myself. It's so bizarre. Is it a good change? I don't know. How can I know? Stupid of me to try to understand. 

"Your father put me into training after-" he cut himself of with a hard swallow. His voice was shaky. I've never seen him not sturdy,  but then again the majority of time I've known him was me sleeping. 

"What, after what?"

"Nothing. After I got here, that's all." His voice returns to distant instead of pained.

Silence takes over, and I force myself to adjust to it. It's so _different._ I think Jack notices my uneasiness.

"So, what about you? Besides the 3 I know about, is there anybody else in your life?" I'm assuming the 3 people he is referencing is my mother, my father, and Hans.

"You. But that's it. I didn't really get the chance to make friends." I shrug while saying.

"Well, why not?"

I pause, trying to find the words. "I just- couldn't." I didn't let myself tell him anything else. I'd appear weak. I will not be weak.

"Okay, I respect your privacy." _Respect?_ Why would anyone respect me?

"So, what do you like to do as a hobby?" He cheerfully asked.

"I don't know... I've never really had a hobby." I say, pondering my own words.

"Well why not?" He smiles.

"Well, what's your hobby?!" I spit back, directing the attention away from me.

"Target practice. It helps me think." He smiles proudly.  "Now why haven't you got one? I'm sure they're is something you love to do. Draw? Run? Anything?"

**Jack**

No hobbies? She must've picked up something, right?  It's so odd- her being baffled at the idea of having a hobby.

She doesn't respond, so I let the quiet fill in.

We arrive at the old apartment building where Elsa used to live, I suppose. I toss her a small pistol, and tell her just in case. 

We walk in, and up the 3 flights of stairs.  Luckily,  she was only on the 2nd floor out of maybe 100 in this building. Once we're in the room, I notice Elsa taking deep breaths. I can only imagine how difficult this must be, but she insisted on coming.

She's pretty strong, I'd say. I don't know what she's lived through, but I bet it was hell.

I grab the several cans of beer, and put them in the backpack. I sling the backpack over my shoulder,  and I realize Elsa isn't in the room.

"Elsa?" I worriedly ask. I'd never forgive myself if I let something happen to her.

No response.

"Elsa!" I screamed, readying my gun.

I walk into the bedroom, my finger on the trigger on the shotgun. I see Elsa- frozen in fear. 

"Elsa?"

Her unsteady arm raises a shaking finger, pointing to a corner. I turn to see him.

Hans.

"Whyyy'ddd youu leavveee mee, Elsiieeee?" His voice slurred with blood.

_I shot a bullet through your skull. You should be dead, but you rose back. Death didn't hold this monster._

"They're... They're evolving." I think aloud.

Hans, or his living corpse, smiles, reveling yellow and green teeth. He's definitely not Hans.

"We have to go, now!" I Shout, shooting at Hans, which only blows him back a foot or two, grabbing Elsa's hand and running.

We run up the stairs,  because down I hear more zombies. We run up several flights of stairs, until we reach a mini sky deck. **(Like a roof, but not on the top floor. Ugh sorry I'm terrible at description )**

I lock the door, trying to think of what to do. Then I hear a voice.

"Jacckk? Cann wee plaayyy?" It's her voice. How is it her?

Emma, my sister, is a few yards away, limping towards me.

**Elsa**

Jack freezes.

"Emma?" He says, his voice on the verge of tears. _Emma?_

The creature was a small girl with brown hair.  The skin around her eyes was a blackish purple, like a heavy bruise, but her eyes were bright. She might have once had beautiful chocolate brown eyes, but the color is faded and drained.

Jack looks so shocked. His eyes widen, and they are glossy. He watches as the zombie approaches him, and he doesn't shoot. Why won't he shoot it?

"Jack! Shoot it!" He doesn't seem to register my words. I remember the gun I have.

I think I know how to work it, but I don't know how to kill.

It isn't murder, right?  Its a thing, a living corpse.

"Jack, please!" I beg for him to snap out of this trance. I don't want to pull a trigger, but he is idle.

So I force myself to do it.

I aim the gun as it clatters in my hand from my shaking. I beg for Jack to wake up, and I can feel a few tears hitting my cheeks. I shut my eyes, and pull the trigger.

I hear two pops. But I only pulled it once, right? I open my eyes,  and the girl-thing is on the ground with side eyes and large smile.

I didn't hit it, did I?

"C'mon! It's okay, we aren't infected!" A girl with two braids and strawberry blonde hair shouts. She stands next to a scruffy boy, who's much taller and bulkier, with shaggy blonde hair. They signal us over.

I run, and drag Jack over, and he seems to find reality again, but his expression is cold and distant. I've never seen him like this.

We follow the two people, and they try to lead us away from the building.

"No, wait! I have a truck, I know a place where to go!" Jack shouts as we see more walkers appear.

The group of us four head back into the building,  and down into the lobby. They, Jack and these new people, do all the shooting.

Jack leads them to his maroon truck, and the rush in. Jack hastily starts his engine and drives away quickly.

Once we all catch our breath, the girl speaks.

"Hey, thanks. I'm Anna, this is my boyfriend, Kristoff." She huffs.

Jack doesn't respond,  so I do the talking. 

"I'm Elsa, this is Jack. He's my... friend." Friends? Are we even that? I only met him when he put a bullet through Hans head, saving me from my hell.

"Cool." Kristoff responds, then asks for water. He explains how they've been surviving by robbing places- empty places, but still homes.

They exchange a look before Kristoff explains how he found Anna when she was 12 digging through trash when he was 15. They grew up together, thrived together, and depend on eachother. 

I'm not sure why they are telling us this, but somehow I like hearing their little story. I apologize for Jack, explaining we have no water with us. Jack just drives, his expression stuck on being distant.

I don't like him distant. I want him to come back to me. Please come back.

We drive for a shorter amount of time than I remember it took us to get here, but my pondering is stopped when the car slams on the break.

I almost break my nose by hitting it on the dash board, and I look up to see in the headlights two people dressed in complete black with creepy smiles holding their faces.

The gates we just ahead. We were so close, but more people dressed in black appeared.

They started banging on the truck, until we heard one yell as they pointed to me.

"That's the girl. Grab here, and don't let the witnesses escape!"

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this first chapter! Please leave kudos and comments! I have written several chapters already, so don't be to scared of waiting for a while. I'm still in the process of writing though. Thanks for the read!


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